Sunday, February 8, 2015

Beep Beep

A couple of days ago THC was walking Koji (the dog, not the Red Sox pitcher; see below for help on distinguishing the two)

                 Koji Dog                                                                  Koji Pitcher                                                     
http://a.espncdn.com/combiner/i?img=/i/headshots/mlb/players/full/30130.png&w=350&h=254when we saw a coyote cross our path and then walk along a parallel track about one hundred feet from us.

Typical Coyote
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/5/56/Wile_E_Coyote.pngA couple of hours later while driving in the hills near Cave Creek with Mrs THC a Roadrunner dashed across the road in front of our car.
Typical Roadrunner:
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/e/ee/Roadrunner_looney_tunes.pngWe have been disappointed not to see any representatives of the Acme Company so far.http://graphics.ink19.com/magazine/printReviews/acmeCatalog.jpegHowever, upon further investigation it appears unlikely that the Acme Company will put in an appearance.  It seems that Wile E Coyote (pictured above, and undoubtedly the very same coyote THC and Koji observed) has filed a lawsuit against Acme in the nearby District Court of Tempe, Arizona (Civil Action No. B19294).  Mr Coyote seeks damages related to Acme's shipment of eighty five products to him over a number of years which he alleges were defective, leading to personal injury, pain and suffering.  You can find more information on his shocking allegations here along with further relevant data compiled by Mr Ian Frazier at this location.

Read for yourself the alleged lamentable shortcomings of one Acme product:
Mr. Coyote states that on December 13th, he received of Defendant via parcel post one Acme Rocket Sled. The intention of Mr. Coyote was to use the Rocket sled to aid him in pursuit of his prey. Upon receipt of the Rocket Sled, Mr. Coyote removed it from its wooden shipping crate and sighting his prey in the distance, activated the ignition. As Mr. Coyote gripped the handlebars, the Rocket Sled accelerated with such sudden and precipitate force as to stretch Mr. Coyote's forelimbs to a length of fifteen feet. Subsequently, the rest of Mr. Coyote's body shot forward with a violent jolt, causing severe strain to his back and neck and placing him unexpectedly astride the Rocket Sled. Disappearing over the horizon at such speed as to leave a diminishing jet trail along its path, the Rocket Sled soon brought Mr. Coyote abreast of his prey. At that moment, the animal he was pursuing veered sharply to the right. Mr. Coyote vigorously attempted to follow this maneuver but was unable to, due to poor design and engineering on the Rocket Sled and a faulty or non-existent steering system. Shortly thereafter, the unchecked progress of the Rocket Sled led it and Mr. Coyote into collision with the side of a mesa. 
From another source, we have obtained information on the specific Acme products in question, an example of which can be found below:
ACME_blog2For those skeptical of the accuracy of reports about this litigation because of doubts as to whether animals can avail themselves of the legal system, THC refers you his post on Law Of The Jungle (or the lex biologica as it is more commonly known) for enlightenment on the well developed corpus of law regarding the animal kingdom.

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